More-or-less Milestone

Counting this low-effort post, Ice Climber has featured 84 posts and has enjoyed 527 hits. Those aren't traditional milestone numbers but it's a nice feeling that this page has survived a ton of schoolwork, a tumultuous and computer-scarce summer and blows to its ego from awareness of damn entertaining weblogs such as this one and this one. But WhatUpThen will make a promise now to himself and to all of you who climb the mountain...uh, yeah, I'll keep trying to make it better. Enough. Go watch Maria, Full of Grace.

New Link

I've added a new link down in the links section. Although I haven't yet scoured the entire site, WorkingForChange includes several newspapers columnists that I like. It's really a voice of...let's say "mainstream progressives." Ellen Goodman, Bill Moyers, Molly Ivins, Byron Williams...generally intelligent writers who aren't as run-of-the-mill as they ought to be. Plus, the site has This Modern World and The Boondocks -- two strips that make the comics page worthwhile.

In other news, WhatUpThen bought a new book. Someone call the fire department.

Class Notes

Another late night with not enough work done to justify the hour...but I do have some ramblings:

If you're white, in college and you want to be perceived as cool, start attending meetings of minority group organizations in your area. It might be awkward at first, what with people wondering if your grandparents were of some particular ethnicity or if you just got too sloshed and wandered away from the frat boys' turf, but eventually the silent accolades will stream in. For bonus points, become an officer.

Does anyone else become strangely proud when noticing a large wound on their body for the first time and having not the slightest idea where it came from?

Honestly, if you're walking in with your punch card to get your 11th burrito free you've got some sort of problem.

Yes, Dennis Quaid really does look like Vince McMahon. No, I'm not sure which one should be more upset by this.

I've played basketball aganist this man several times. He walks his way up the court, shoves people while trying to grab rebounds and during a jump shot he either makes a kissing noise or exclaims: "Daddy...love him." Complete asshole...that is, until I saw him on CNN interviewing Arnold Schwarzenegger. Now I just can't decide whether to respect him or not.

Did Clay Aiken win something? Is he special? Why are people still mentioning his name in articles?

Four weeks into the quarter and I have no idea what my biology professor's name is.

Is it just me or is a deep-voiced woman just the sexiest thing? There must be something physiological about that. Like maybe deep-voiced women ovulate twice per month. I must find out for myself.

Hidden pleasures from staying up until 4am...Bosom Buddies is on TV RIGHT NOW!!

No one asked, but since getting paid I've bought a Fossil Arkitekt watch, some new Nikes, a new cell phone and 4 enchiladas from Taco Del Mar. I was tempted to go buy an iPod this evening, but you know what they say: A fool and his money are soon parted. Aack!

Heh, a fool and his girlfriend...

If you want to see a grown man cower and run away just put him on a racquetball court for the first time in his life. It's comedy, you know.

God, this show is dumb.

Yeah, Napoleon Dynamite was pretty good. But, come on, it wasn't all that. Way to get some Jamiroquai in there, though. Go producers!

Alright, then. Time to go to bed, get up and get back on track. Love you all out there...make today a good one.

Power of Blogger

Good article on people blogging their emotions here.

Good ol' SFGate!

WhatUpThen is certainly one of those emotionally guarded individuals. It's very rare that you see me bare my soul on the Ice Climber and, even then, we're discussing a muted version of whatever the feeling is. I really appreciate those people, though. There is certainly a feeling you get...some familiarity as if you really know these people. Hell, as crazy as Wonda is, I felt for her when Steve cheated on her with Lora...now why would I possibly pay attention to these random people? That's just the power of Blogger!

Clever Words from a Clever Man

I'm on 24, so I didn't see all that much Johnny Carson. Maybe my parents didn't even let me stay up that late back then. But I've seen some episodes and some monologues and I had a bit of respect for him. Enough to want to read all of the tributes and obituaries. While scouring them I found this reprinting of a monologue. Kinda funny, but I completely forgot where it came from. I apologize to you out there, but read and enjoy. Thanks Johnny Carson.

A Carson monologue given as a tribute to the newly-fallen Soviet Union in 1991, with "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" played in the background:

Democracy is buying a big house you can't afford with money you don't have to impress people you wish were dead. And, unlike communism, democracy does not mean having just one ineffective political party; it means having two ineffective political parties. ...

Democracy is welcoming people from other lands, and giving them something to hold onto — usually a mop or a leaf blower. It means that with proper timing and scrupulous bookkeeping, anyone can die owing the government a huge amount of money. ...

Democracy means free television, not good television, but free. ...

And finally, democracy is the eagle on the back of a dollar bill, with 13 arrows in one claw, 13 leaves on a branch, 13 tail feathers, and 13 stars over its head — this signifies that when the white man came to this country, it was bad luck for the Indians, bad luck for the trees, bad luck for the wildlife, and lights out for the American eagle. I thank you.

WhatUpThen Singing "St. Patrick's Day"

Quite a voice on that young man

Background music is extremely faint. Coupla missed notes and I screwed up the transition to falsetto. Singing quietly because of roommates. I've got to do this in the daytime.

Go. Sit. Watch.

Okay okay, I still haven't seen White Noise but, trust me, Michael Keaton is my favorite actor. Plus, I may have missed my opportunity because it doesn't seem to be playing in University District theatres anymore. It'll be tops on the list when it comes out on video...no, really, it will be.

WhatUpThen is dishing out the stars for a couple of current movies, though...The Woodsman and In Good Company. The Woodsman is bleak and hopeful at the same time and the climactic scene is jaw-dropping. Fine acting, fine writing. The only thing is that everyone seems connected to molestation in one way or another. For how many out of every ten people is this a vivid reality? I'm sure it's more than I realize.

In Good Company has Quaid, Topher Grace and My Girl Scarlett Johansson. Let me give you a chronology for that: first I saw Ghost World, then I saw An American Rhapsody, after that I started calling Scarlett Johansson My Girl Scarlett Johansson, then I saw Lost In Translation, then The Perfect Score, then My Brother the Pig, so to sum it up I'm a big ScarJo fan. Quickly, it's sappy but not too sappy, has its message about monopolization and corporate unification, is funnier than I would have dared it to be and, well...it's enjoyable. So go spend your money.

And then there's Briana showing some of that New York resilience.

And, totally unrelated...how did the Suns lose that game against San Antonio??

Do You Have The Time...

To listen to me whine?

As I sit at my desk this late hour drinking Cerveza Pacifico and listening to New Jack Swing...

I'm still thinking about her. It is difficult when one has lost the object of their affection. Life is unfair, I know. There are situations where I know I must deal with it...move on...grin and bear it...tough break, kid...life's a bitch, then you die. That last one is a personal favorite of mine. But I still can't get over how it happened. What did I do to her? Why didn't she warn me?

Then there's the motherfucker who appeared out of thin air...

It feels like I wrote the proposal, did the research, formed the argument, typed the essay and slid it, stapled and polished, into a yellow, manila envelope. Then, while I was away, the new employee signed his name on my envelope and turned it in to the boss, just as she was looking for some material to review. When did we hire this new guy? Why is he in my office? What do you mean I'm fired? Haven't I been a good employee? I really need this job! I love working here!

If you're wrongfully terminated from a job, you can sue for damages or to get your job back. But if you're wrongfully terminated from a relationship you can't sue. If you complain or retaliate it looks like you're the crazy one. How frustrating is it to be put into a situation where you have no options? And no information? And no love? I guess wrongful termination doesn't apply to couples.

Well, enough whining. I'll get over it. Plus, there are people with real problems out there.

Don't Be Ridiculous

In the Seattle P-I today it says Kraft Foods will scale back advertising on some of its high-sugar and high-fat foods for kids like Capri Sun and Oreos in response to concerns about U.S. childhood obesity. The funny part, though: "Kraft won't cease all advertising of fatty, sugary products such as Lunchables and Pebbles cereal, however -- TV ads for such products will still be seen during adult and family shows such as "According to Jim." The only thing...they forgot to put quotation marks around the word "adult". I'm sure everyone watching "According to Jim" has the sophistication of a nine-year old, so it sounds like a good advertising strategy.

Now that it's on my mind, TGIF has been crap television ever since I was a kid. I looked it up on Wikipedia and they have quite a bit of information on it. I mean, look, when you've been on the air for 14 years (since 1988 but with a 3-season hiatus) and your crowning achievement is Balki Bartokomous...let's just say you haven't been performing a service for the community. Here are some TGIF "highlights" if you don't feel like clicking over:

Sabrina, The Teenage Witch
Hangin' With Mr. Cooper
Full House                   Perfect Strangers
Mr. Belvedere              Family Matters
Step By Step                
Boy Meets World - btw, Ben Savage went to my school. I heard he's a jackass.


Sadly, this is the greatest character ever on TGIF

But there's no shortage of trash television today, evidently. In that same issue of the P-I is an article about the TV midseason. Undeterred by the ban on cameras in the courtroom for Michael Jackson's upcoming trial, E! is gonna re-enact each day of the trial using actors. They'll be using the court transcript as their...well, script. All I can think is that the actor (actress, perhaps, since MJ is 5'10" and something like 120 lbs.? Maybe whomever placed second on America's Next Top Model) playing Michael Jackson will get some good career exposure. Otherwise, well...I guess it's good I don't watch a ton of TV these days.

WhatUpThen Singing "One In A Million You"

Hip then, Hip now

I screwed up the lyrics in the first verse because I don't really know them. Also, I continue to sing in the lower octave when Larry Graham goes up just because it's almost 1am and I don't want to wake my roommate. I should do this more often.

An Example I Follow

Sprizee is a blogger whose page is my most frequently visited bookmark. I don't know her; she's some woman in Seattle just minding her own business and probably wondering why she gets so many hits from the University of Washington. Thing is, she is the blogging standard I aspire to. She talks about herself, like me. Yet, she is incredibly consistent in postnig frequency where I am a binge poster of sorts. Sprizee is pretty funny--somehow the sarcasm is communicated through the writing. -->

Hang on for a second. I just gotta say that David Bowie's Ashes to Ashes is playing right now on my Winamp. I've heard this song a thousand times...own the CD and everything...but I had no idea this song has words! For like 3 years I thought it was an instrumental. Okay, now Shonen Knife's Gyoza is playing. This definitely has words...

Spiced, minced pork
Wrapped in a small pancake
Steamed or fried
Tastes so good

Fucking Amen!

<-- And Sprizee seems reasonably hip, intelligent and well-adjusted, so there. That's the model for Ice Climber. Tailored to the peculiarities of WhatUpThen, of course.

Work. It's uh, picking up. Heh. Amazing that it's only Tuesday, I only have one class and already the weekend can't arrive soon enough.

Morford: Void Where Inhibited

This Mark Morford guy (the one with the very nice bio page) seems to write about Bush and the polarization of the United States every week. And in the San Francisco paper, too...he's the perfect example of preaching to the choir and I don't know how effective his formula is compared to, say, Joan Ryan, who actually writes material to make the reader think rather than just nod in agreement. Don't get me wrong, I like the guy. Just sometimes seems his reminders on the backward nature of this country get a little tired. His resolutions column is damn entertaining, though:

"Resolution #6 - More houseplants fewer Pottery Barns. More nipples fewer Parents Television Councils. More relaxed patience less bitter tailgating. More local and sustainable less factory farmed and chem injected. More authentic moans fewer fake smiles. More Nick Cave less Shania Twain. More grass-fed less hormone blasted. More yoga less Monday Night Football. More good porn less Spice Channel. More Whole Foods less Safeway. More truthout and commondreams and AlterNet, less MSNBC and CNN and even the slightest stain of Fox News."

Am I link-happy this afternoon?

Step Into My Office

From Wildlife Biology Lab:

When the Eastern Salamander mates with the Western Salamander they sometimes produce infertile offspring. But even if fertile, the offspring can have a tough time finding a mate because its courtship methods are out of whack. Neither Eastern nor Western salamanders will recognize or respond to its behaviors --> Hey, that sounds like some people I know! Shit.

I write this while sitting in the back of Epidemiology 513, taping the class for my Classroom Services job. But I won't be working here much longer. In fact, when I get off in about 2 hours I'm telling my boss I quit. "Why?" you much be asking yourself. It's because I got a new job, baby! Graduate Staff Assistant in tha HAAAAAAAOOOOOUSE!! It pays 2.5 times what I'm paid at Classroom Services and with the same hours! It's located on the same block as my apartment! It pays my tuition! I have an office! Did you read that last sentence? I HAVE AN OFFICE!!! Now all I need is a secretary...

Seriously, though, this is a big thing for me. I'm going to be advising all 36 student groups affiliated with the Ethnic Cultural Center on campus and helping them put on their events. I'm going to have to know a lot of people and do a lot of work; it's certainly more involved than any other job I've had. But it really is time. There are many ways I feel I haven't proven myself to other and to me, but I'm ready (oh so ready) to do this.

Fuck, how am I gonna face my boss about quitting Classroom Services? By the time I write this will have already quit, but it's so bad to quit so abruptly and unexpectedly like this. Reminds me of another situation, actually...well, no, it's not quite the same. Oh well, gotta do what you gotta do. I'm sure this job will produce many blogworthy people and stories and stories about people.