Martyrizing - Kinda Like the Cleaners

Lately, I've been martyr-izing myself in a big way. Ooh, dictionary.com says "martyrize" is a real word; no dash needed. So, anyway, I've been making a martyr of myself. It's a offshoot of my breakup, where on the surface it appears as if all the responsibility for it lies with people other than myself. I would never fall into the trap of blaming everyone but myself for bad things that happen, but it seems that a very strong case could be made to let me off the hook. By the way, I'm talking about something that happened nearly three months ago...think someone is having trouble letting go??

The problem with this martyrization is that I've begun to apply it in other areas, too. Normally I'm very understanding of different people's philosophies and styles and paces, but now whenever someone seems to drop the ball I just get so angry at them! Every little thing! When a prospective employer fails to respond to my job application, I martyrize. When my roommate tracks his shower-water all over the bathroom, I martyrize. When my friends don't return my emails or never make themselves available, I martyrize. I feel like Kobe Bryant on the new-look Lakers when they're down 15 in the early 4th-quarter and he gets pissed at his teammates and feels like he's the only person capable of doing anything right. I know I'm not Kobe (thank goodness) and I know that my friends can sink the figurative jumpshot and that some amazing people surrounding me can even sink the figurative left-handed 3-pointer.

So, I pledge that I'll stop becoming irate over little things people sometimes overlook. God, why have I been so angry lately at all! It's not good for the blood pressure (although my svelte 186-pound frame probably regulates that better than before!). How about this for a truce? Everyone sweat the little details a bit more and I'll sweat the little details a bit less. Sounds good to me.